???

If thoughts are words and words create..manifest..

And

Writing is words and words create..manifest..

Producing energy..moving towards a goal..place..effect..situation..

What should my thoughts be..??

And what words should be typed or written to produce…?

Angst…?

Panic..?

Love…? There is that word again…LOVE..

Lies..?

Hope..?

And those terms listed above are all understandable…not quite as simple as we like to make them..because we have taken profound words such as hate and love and used them to describe our addictions..

I love my cell phone…same love we apply to our partner…

So if thoughts make words which make writing and a form of creation..

What should those words always be..?

Can they be negative…?

Because if we always paint something flowery…and then we pull back the curtain..we might not always find sunlight streaming through the window, dancing like rainbows on the walls, fresh springy air circling around the room, giving thoughts of swinging in a hammock as our fingertips graze the turquoise water cooling us to our toes…

It might be..

Our back yard bumps up to the dump..place of refuse and the back hoe keeps moving it closer and closer to our flower beds..or that television sitting proudly in our living room that we love…and everything smells like vomit…

I have been there…

And maybe sometimes you have to use the negative words…truth words to describe the reality of the situation…

So if needed…you get the hell out..

So if you keep telling yourself(thoughts) that you misunderstand, did not just see that, oh it was an accident,( help me I could be here all day) you very possibly can be having the dump in your living room and you are wondering why the view to the television is obscured…

Yeah..you get it now…

And on the flip side…if you are not aware of what you do have…or put no value on people and give it all to things…well you might be in for a mighty mess..

This is a lot easier than you think…

When you are in a reality that is profane..I am using such nice words today..sometimes you have to keep your head down and barrel through..I think they call that survival..

Most often than not…if you are in a profane situation..you have to..you must see it for what it really is..

Which is a hard task…

The harder task is seeing you for what you really are…

Beautiful…just a bit confused and very tired…

And no I am not referring to the sociopaths, etc, etc, etc…you all know what and who you are..

So if my thoughts keep creating an existence not real…and giving verbal credit and description to inane things we can definitely live without..do I not create that reality…?

So what if I take my thoughts..speak them..whether I am uncomfortable or not..going against the grain of descriptions we have for women..different ethnicities, belief systems, and speak what they really are…truth..

What happens…?

My thoughts are created from things I am receiving..and we have a tendency to skew the image to fit what we believe…

So my words create the ever present reality I am dancing in every moment of every day..

Example…

As a child my father tortured his children at night..it is called sleep deprivation..can make you wacky…

Drunks and addicts create the same things in them…you think you sleep, but you do not..it is a form of blacking out…the body does not go into rest and repair..it is placed in a hold of trying to keep all body systems(heart, brain, organs) running at sub par level from the drug..of choice..

So rest really never happens…

So as an adult sleep has been an issue…and I have to give its due credit…most of my adult life..the abuse came at night for me, and for my children…so being aware is what I had to be…

But now…not reality..I am safe..and this is a very recent development..

No need to be prepared to flee or fight…

So my thoughts are still…be ready..hard to rest with that happening…

So my thoughts were creating a reality that came into effect even after the horror was gone…

And please go easy on yourself…these are examples…

So my thoughts are created from what I see happening…and have been told to see..thus creating words that make my attitude…everything…

So when I started seeing reality..what was really happening and what was being hidden and why…my words changed…and I realized the power of those words..

Look at your reality…

Be grateful…or be shocked…

And decide what thoughts will you have to speak or write words to reinforce..create that reality..

And why we stay in a descriptive reality worded and colored by another…?

This my friend has been my greatest adventure ever…

My smile has returned…and my laugh..and I have just taken off the gloves covering my hands…and there is a whole suit of armor I am wearing..

I wonder what I will find…?

And no I am not scared at all…

I will not find rotting flesh…we all know who has that…

I think..I know…I will find all those things abusers liked having me not see..all those things that terrified them…all those things they chose not to be…

I think there is need of more cake…

So many parties…and plenty of time..

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~ by HopeGlenn on June 9, 2017.

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