Reflection into humanity….

I once heard that people..mainly..and events are a reflection of sorts of what we need to acknowledge and deal with…

Not many like the words..deal with it…sort of like issues…and that famous..letting go..wordage….

But if one can pursue it from the perspective of..things that need my attention..

Sort of like the laundry…and bills needing to be paid…

Yet they hold some deeper meaning and purpose..into our humanity…

And at times can make us so spitting angry…because life..through whatever form..call us on it…

Like love…

I have started a new job..position..after completing education and taking state boards…

Now I am licensed…and able..and willing to venture into this field..I thrive in..and yet makes me also..hesitate..

Because it is a reflection into humanity…

What we allow ourselves to do..

How weakened we have placed our moral code…

How we have decided..excuses..are the path..rather than facing the angst..one has placed inside another…

And every day..as I look into the eyes..of those helpless to the world now…

I see…

And what I have settled for…

And what I have allowed my intentions to be…

And to examine….Why am I doing this..?

Oh the question of the hour….

The other day..I wrote about an incident..where I was disrespected…

And the huge impact it had on me..

And when confrontation was placed on the doorstep…or if you like the word” addressing”..the issue better than confrontation…

We will go with that…

I thought Hell had arrived on my doorstep..

And in some loopy doop world…it had..

And for me accepting it..even for five seconds…had me looking in the mirror and reflecting into humanity…

What else was I condoning..accepting…because well..do not want to ruffle a feather…

And as I was being screamed at..and spittle being thrown across my face…

I had an aha moment…

And to be honest..sometimes I wish I was dumb as a brick…

For thirty years..20 of a marriage..and 10 dealing with a divorce..and children being drugged and used as weapons…

I realized..I got this ticket…

And now I am running in the other direction…

Not sidestepping the issue..or trying to placate another..so they stop yelling..or punching…

But pure and simple..running in the other direction…

And in the voice..I heard it speak words..telling me..I had the power to put thoughts within another mind..

That I had the ability..to make one become filthy inside themselves..and they had no choice in the matter…I was at fault..I produced this creation…and suddenly I have become God…

And you have to stop and go HUH????!!!!!

Because that is usually where one will be stopped…and start the apology session for something you have not done..

And anger..and threatening stances….and accusations..and spit being showered on you..

All create the fear..to make another apologize for one breathing…

Trust me..I was real good at that…

And show you what you have settled for…and what one is spreading into the world…

And it made me pause at work last night..and think…what am I doing..?

And why…?

How do I expect..to be of value and use…

When I am allowing myself to be disrespected..lied to..and made to be the cause of your violence…

Do we not have free will..

Are we not created with our own thoughts…

Do we not choose..every second of every day..which step to take…

Do we not become..what we take in…

So how did I suddenly have the power to make something in you…?

Am I now choosing for you..?

Because if I am..

I think the porn..the alcohol..the ogling women…the excuses..of oh poor me…need to go…

And how convenient for you…

And how convenient I have made it for you…

Even scarier..right…

Because when I wiped..the spit off my cheeks…I allowed the reflection to come back around…and the mirror was right in front of me…

And I saw why I have allowed this…

And if I allow it for me…I will allow it for those..

Incapable of fighting back..or speaking…yet know that spit…

Burns like acid…

 

 

 

 

 

Advertisements

~ by HopeGlenn on April 16, 2014.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

 
%d bloggers like this: