My Past..is just that..the past…

Too many want to define others..by what has happened in the past…

Rather than focusing on the person..presently standing in front of them…

And if I allow myself to be focused on my past..it will dominate me..into believing..simply put lies..

In all honesty…you cannot determine..whom someone is by their past…

To some whom were abused…to those who have hindered..to those who just lived life..and messed up and had big whopping glories…it is simply..what has happened…

And from there..that spot..you make a choice…

What am I to be…

Is this defining me..determining me…because this society says I must be this or that..because I came from this or that…

Or am I going to choose this life..shining in front of me..and face it..whether good bad or indifferent…

Not from yesterday..but from right now….

I for one..am silly tired of being determined for who I am..from where I came from…

Okay for all you who do not know….

I come from the ghetto of New York..

Had lice more times than I can count…

Was starved and abused..use your imagination…

And was shy…a nerd…go figure..and married the wrong man…

Because I let my past…determine the choice I was to make…

Life at this present moment..is hard enough..without me dwelling on what happened yesterday…

And I cannot spend my time…swimming in yesterday..hoping to control today…and believing that I am trash..because another wants to use the past..to determine..everything about the future…

Right now..I am determining my future…

Yes I am not where I want to be..I ride the bus to class..and I struggle with some things…

We all do…

But if I keep looking over my shoulder…and letting others tell me how horrid..what I have is…

Then I am bound to be defined..by my past…and I will never be able to deal with the present..and to be honest..what a mighty gift it is…

So if you will excuse me…

I need to study for a killer exam on Wednesday…get some sleep..so I can be rested to walk to the bus…and tutor a friend before class…and smile…and some days frown…

And be tickled pink…because the only thing the past has to do with the present..is this…

Hi…I am Mandy Lynn Carroll…

Nice to meet you…

Advertisements

~ by HopeGlenn on December 15, 2013.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

 
%d bloggers like this: