Almost….

Last few days I have spent my night watching the moonlight filter in threw the lace curtains…

I have watched the sky move throughout the stage of my backyard..sitting with my knees tucked to my chin and my nose close to being scrunched on the glass of the window…

I am held captive by the night and how it calls me…how the chatter of the birds..flowers and trees..is hushed by the sleepy winds lifting the branches up..and then laying them down again..

Nighttime is not my time of rest…not after what my body and mind have endured and the disease I am facing…

I have been so conditioned..even after I face fifty…to think of night as a time to think..be alert..create…

Yet age has made it harder for me to move this body to the sketch pad..or to the fabrics…or words I have moving in my head like a symphony…It would prefer to lie..tucked under the covers..staring into the night..and believing I am a great artist..a great creator…a mind worth publishing.

And I speak to the words..making music in my head…asking them to be remembered when the dawn comes..and it is a more appropriate time for me to writing..sewing..painting..or even thinking of these things…

So I lie there and appreciate…sometimes I am perched..like a bird on the edge of the side of the bed..eyes big and bright..and a smile mischievously peeking out…all sorts of ideas..hopes and dreams..and thought..and I believe in the shadows of the night..they might be a reality…they just might come true…

I find myself dozing..watching perhaps the clouds move and then as day emerges the lightness starts lifting them…I can see the trees lift from their weariness..deep slumber and turn their leaves to the morning sun…and I find the words..the magic..the symphony slipping away..and it has lost its grandeur..its splendor…because I must busy myself with the tasks of the day..

Yet as I lay in the evening talk..the jabber of the moon..and stars..and see life rest for a moment..I will believe…

I believe the sun will rise and gently lift my head up..and my body will be at peace…I will see the lace curtains twinkle in the breeze…and for that moment..before my feet step to the floor…my toes find those slippers…I will not shake…I will not think…I will not know what this day is going to teach me…I will be me…before all this became my description….

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~ by HopeGlenn on April 22, 2012.

2 Responses to “Almost….”

  1. Awarded The Delicate Soul Prize.

    Like

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