Chicken Soup….

I am writing today…trying to condense my life into brief chapters and then I am laughing…

I love how the universe decides to coincide powerful moments of healing with your physical being breaking down….

I have to laugh..I have to cry…my hands are shaking so bad..I have to go back and back and rewrite what my hands had difficulty doing the first time..I make myself slow down…and read the words I write and feel them for this moment…

I am making chicken soup today…been cooking the chicken and preparing the base for the soup the last two days…chicken soup is healing to me..even if it is the one you get in the can and have with your saltines…it is healing..it brings a familiar, happy thought to our hearts and makes one feel just a bit better…

I am making soup today because I need to heal…I need to heal from the breakdown of my body and I am having problems with putting words together….I am making soup to heal from my attempts to push people away and make me a bad person..so I did not deserve attention, time, consideration.

I am making soup today because it is something I can still do…and not have to feed into the energy of anything else that wants to make me feel bad or change me…I want to make soup and be here in my sweats, baggy sweater, un-showered and feet in pink slippers….

I am making soup today because I want to remember…yes remember..I do not want to pretend today…I want to feel that person today that will not allow herself mercy of any kind…that person that will not feed herself because she must get this done….the person who will not allow herself to go get a movie because it will delay what she needs to get done…the person who is being stupid right now and wants to share that we all do the same thing..just I seem to be able to blurt it out to everyone that I am a basket case today…

Because someone…including me…needs to hear that pink slippers, sweats and the big sweater..without a shower are just great..and that they are loved no matter how they look..and that it is okay I am not showing myself mercy…but I will in a few minutes.

Because someone needs to know…that chicken soup whether made in a pot or poured from a can..shared with a movie or the book you have been dying to read..is exactly the best thing for you right now…

So if you will excuse me…it is time for me to eat the chicken soup…and watch that show that makes me smile..and read just a bit of the book that takes me away…

And then I will be able to deal with today..this reality..this life…again…

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~ by HopeGlenn on March 12, 2012.

One Response to “Chicken Soup….”

  1. I love this!

    Like

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